A Word for the Church: The Comfortable Wall

Summer camp was always exhausting, and it was especially so as a counselor who stayed for a few weeks at a time and who had very little rest on weekends. So when I had to catch a ride with my counselor friend from Bethel Camp in Kentucky back to my home in Asheville, North Carolina, I knew it was important that I stay awake to help keep her awake. We were both exhausted, but neither one of us wanted to veer off the road in our somnolent state. As I recall, I even heard from my friend's mother, who told me -- quite seriously -- that I needed to make sure I stayed awake to keep her daughter awake.

So with the very best of intentions, I sat in the passenger's seat and made small-talk and reiterated the week, and I felt the weight of my eyelids and that awful heaviness that happens when you just... can't... stay... awake...

Zzzz... 

Next thing I knew, I was waking up as my friend pulled into her driveway. I was disoriented, and still half-asleep as I blinked in surprise. My friend's mother eyed me and said with a good, solid hint of reproof: "I asked you to stay awake for her sake."

Today is Thursday of Holy Week, and on this day, Jesus has observed the Passover Feast with His disciples in the upper room. He's broken the bread, passed the cup, washed His disciples' feet. He's warned Peter that he'll deny Him before the rooster crows, He's dipped His bread in the bowl with the traitor Judas, and they've sung a hymn of worship together. 

It's been a long night.

The night's only started. 

Jesus and His followers head out to Gethsemane (which means in Hebrew: oil press, a place where olives are squeezed for their oil -- quite a fitting analogy). Jesus tells most of His disciples to sit at a certain spot and wait for Him while He prays.

He takes with Him Peter, James, and John, and they go a little farther. "He said to them, ' My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.'"

I've often wondered: Why these specific disciples? Why is it that He chooses Peter, James, and John to continue on with Him when He asks the others to wait? I don't have answers, but it's a good reminder to me that we have specific roles, assigned to us by our Lord. Some of us are the sitters-and-waiters, and some of us are the go-on-aheaders. Some of us are the bulletin organizers, and some of us are the pastors. Some of us are the custodians, and some of us are the overseers. Whatever our job is... we are to "keep watch."

Peter, James, and John... despite their best intentions, doze off. It's late; they've had a meal that includes bread. Their stomachs are rumbly and comfortable and digesting, and those eyelids are just... so... heavy...

Zzzzz...

While this is happening, Jesus has gone a little farther, falling with His face to the ground, and in anguish of His Spirit, He cries out: "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from Me. Yet not as I will, but as You will."

Was it possible? Certainly. As the Author of this entire story, God could certainly have pressed Ctrl+Alt+Del, and watched the entire thing blink into nothingness. I've done it before -- scrapped an entire manuscript, because everything had gone wonky with it. God had the option to do it, and His Son had just asked Him to do it. 

But there's a corollary. 

"Yet not as I will, but as You will."

The war Jesus fights is fought in the Garden of Gethsemane. He "sets His face like flint" (Isaiah 50:7) in this space where He pours Himself out before His Father

Later, when He stands before Caiaphas, and then Pilate, Herod, and the screaming, blood-thirsty crowd, when He faces the scourging, and the spikes, and the utter physical, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion of fulfilling the Scriptures by His death...

He's already won His battle. Fought here. On His face on the ground, while His disciples slept.

He goes back to His disciples, and He finds them sleeping. "'Simon,' He said to Peter, 'are you asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak.'"

Note here: this is mid-battle. Jesus is fighting His own war, and He's asking for His disciples to keep watch. 

I don't think He's necessarily telling them to keep watch for Judas and Co. to enter the Garden. Like Jesus often does, He gives a larger command that encompasses more ground than the present circumstances call for. 

Watch and pray. When you sleep, you're not watching. When you're snoring in your bed, you're not praying. When you're unaware, those are the times the enemy uses to his advantage.

A couple of days ago, I wrote in Keeping a Weather-Eye Out about the importance Jesus placed on watchfulness -- in context, He gave this warning in a prophetic passage about end-time events. Jesus wasn't just concerned about His disciples' sleep-deprived state in the Garden; He was telling them to stay awake. When Peter, many years later penned these words: "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour" (1 Peter 5:8), I think He was remembering the echo of Jesus' words in his ears: "Could you not keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation."

Jesus goes off to wage His war again, repeating His petition, with the same corollary: Not as I will, but as You will.

When He comes back, do you imagine He sighs a little at His disciples' nodding heads and closed eyes? "Are you still sleeping and resting?" He asks. "Enough! The hour has come. Look, the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise! Let us go! Here comes My betrayer."

Enter: Judas and a bunch of people with swords and clubs, sent from the teachers of the law, the chief priests, and the elders. 

And I'll leave it there. 

See... this "oil press" where Jesus fights His battle is a crucial battleground. As I said above, it's where Jesus sets His face like flint toward His intended purpose, the purpose that is scripted out for Him by the Author and Perfecter.

I want to highlight this: it's important. He didn't have to. But... He did. "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, Who -- for the joy set before Him -- endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God" (Hebrews 12:2).

We, you and I, are the joy that He was looking at, past all the promise of pain and sorrow and dread. 

So while we -- His joy -- were sleeping instead of doing as He asked... He still fought His battle... and won.

This morning as I prayed, I saw a picture of a wall. It was drywall, painted, a living room wall in a house. The only thing odd about it was that there was a saw wedged into the middle of the wall, the handle out one side, the metal end out the other. No one gripped it, no one utilized it, but it was there, in the wall, a tool that was ready to saw downward.

I asked the Lord what He wanted to show me with the picture, and this is what I came to: We're comfortable in our living rooms. It's where we live. It's normal. It's homey. But there's a saw in the wall. Once that saw is put into use, the wall will no longer be seamless and strong, but will open up a weakness, much like a crack in a dam. 

The wall is our sleepy state. In many ways, the church has been sleeping for a long while. We've plastered veneers over our perspective with fine words that declare blessing and comfort. 

Ezekiel 13:10-12 has some strong words to say about this: "When a flimsy wall is built, they cover it with whitewash; therefore tell those who cover it with whitewash that it is going to fall... When the wall collapses, will people not ask you, 'Where is the whitewash you covered it with?'" 

May we see past the whitewash, the veneer, the pretty comforts we surround ourselves with to understand the tool in the wall. There is a battle we are fighting right now; and if we fall asleep, the wall's separation and collapse will surprise us when we open our eyes again and look into the reproving face of our Father. "Why did you fall asleep? Could you not keep watch for one hour?"

We have to wake up; we must be on alert. There's a wall, and it's breaking all around us, and many of us are too sleepy to take it in. "Watch and pray so that you may not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."

My spirit is willing, but it's so, so hard to push sleep away. Lord, give us strength.